Tip: do question prep!
How? You can look up some questions on the internet or look at the examples below. Try to pick out questions you think would be appropriate for the situation. For example, if you have talked to this person before and have talked about their work, you can ask further questions about their work.
Why? Preparing some questions to ask your date will help you get to know them better, help you keep the conversation equally focused on you and them, and prevent awkward silences.
“Where do you work?”
“Where do you go to school?”
“What do you like to do/what are your hobbies?”
“What’s your favorite TV show/book/movie/song/artist/etc.?”
“Who in your family are you closest to?”
“What is your favorite holiday?”
And most importantly, if they ask you a question, give them an answer and follow up with: “and you?” or something similar.
Warning: do not just randomly ask these questions. Try to blend them in with the conversation.
Tip: prepare for the date early!
How? Write out a plan if it helps you. Make sure you are planning things like outfit, shoes, hairstyle, makeup, and questions. Make sure that you feel comfortable and confident with your choices. You should not be uncomfortable on your date.
Why? If you plan early, you will not be panicked on the day of the date. You will know exactly what you need to do to prepare the day of the date. You will also ensure that you are comfortable and confident with your choices.
Example/My Pre-Date Plan:
Cut out dairy, eggs, meat, and carbonated beverages 1 week before date.
Amp up workout routine 1 week before date.
Pick out hairstyle 3 days before date.
Pick out makeup 3 days before date.
Pick out outfit 2 days before date.
Confirm date, time, and place 1 day before the date.
~day of ~
Do skincare routine
Do haircare routine
Give yourself a pep talk
Use perfume & breath mints
Meditate & pray
Tip: wear the right outfit!
How? Make sure you pick out something you feel comfortable and confident in (I cannot stress this enough!). If you feel more confident in dresses, wear a dress! If you would feel better in pants, wear pants! If you want to be in a serious, committed relationship with this person I recommend being somewhat modest. If you are looking more for a physical relationship, wear clothing as revealing as you’d like. The best advice I ever received was to dress for what you want on a date. So, dress relatively conservative if you want a long-term relationship and less conservative if you’d like a physical relationship. If you feel more comfortable in something revealing, though, and still want a long-term relationship, go for it! The person you’re going out with should respect you regardless of what you’re wearing anyways.
Why? If you feel comfortable and confident in what you’re wearing, it will show. You will be happier and more agreeable on the date. If you are uncomfortable, you might be snappy and grumpy. No one wants to be grumpy on a date, and no one wants to go on a date with someone who is grumpy. When picking out your outfit, remember this date is not just for the person you are going with, it is for you too! You should be comfortable and confident so that you will have fun.
Winter/Fall-comfortable jeans or pants (leggings are okay too but not recommended), a modest plain shirt, and a comfortable jacket. Comfortable boots with warm socks are recommended.
Spring/Summer-comfortable, modest shorts, a modest t-shirt or tank top, and comfortable shoes. You can wear a jacket or hoodie if it is a bit cold out.
Tip: change up your diet (if needed)!
How? For a date, I recommend cutting out at least meat, dairy, eggs, and carbonated drinks. If you can, I would also recommend cutting out sugar and preservatives. It’s best to cut this out at least a month prior, but you can do as little as 2 days before. Try to reduce liquids and solids about 2 hours before the date.
Why? Cutting out these products will help you lose a bit of extra weight and get rid of any excess gas. Not eating a lot of food or drinking a lot of water 2 hours before the date will prevent you from having to use the bathroom 100 times during the date.
Example Diet (edit as needed!):
Breakfast-fruits or veggies with healthy protein smoothie
Dinner-vegan protein with vegetables
Snacks-nuts, fruits, vegetables.
Tip: start working out or working out more!
How? Either start working out lightly every day or amp up your workout routine about 1 month before. Be sure you do not injure yourself while doing this.
Why? Working out will make you look and feel much better. This will make you more confident and agreeable on your date.
If you are just starting out, I would suggest walking for about 30 minutes per day. If you already work out and have a good routine, just try doing one more set or one more minute of your workout each day.
Tip: start or continue your perfect skincare routine!
How? Look up skincare routines online and try some out. Do not try out a new skincare routine less than 2 weeks before the date.
Why? Doing a skincare routine will make your skin look and feel better.
Skincare Routine Example:
Cleanse skin with African Black Soap (this gets rid of acne but dries skin out)
Tone face with witch hazel
Moisturize face with African shea butter
Tip: start or continue your perfect haircare routine!
How? Look up haircare routines online and try some out. Do not try out a new haircare routine less than 2 weeks before the date.
Why? Doing a haircare routine will make your hair look better.
Haircare Routine Example:
Shampoo and condition hair
Do a deep conditioning treatment
Apply hair oil
Wrap up hair to preserve moisture until it is time to style
Tip: be hygienic!
How? Make sure to brush your teeth, shower, and wear clean clothing for the date. Practice good hygiene such as washing your hands during the date.
Why? Good hygiene makes you look and smell better. Many people say that a good smell is very important on a first date.
Examples of Good Hygiene:
Shower/bathing/washing your body in general
Brush and floss teeth
Wearing clean clothes
Washing hands after using bathroom and before eating
Covering mouth and nose when sneezing or coughing
Tip: give yourself a pep talk!
And finally, for the most important tip….
Tip: meditate and pray!